THE CHALLENGE OF UNANSWERED PRAYER

                I’ll call him Jeff. He was thirteen years old, a member of my youth group and full of life. Then the bad news came; Jeff had leukemia. Jeff was amazing. He never lost his positive spirit, even during the darkest times. He went through all of the standard treatments. He lost his hair. He received a bone marrow transplant. We prayed earnestly for Jeff to be healed. Jeff fought valiantly, but a year and a half later Jeff died.

                We have all experienced it in our spiritual life. We earnestly prayed for something and it didn’t materialize. I’m not referring to trivial things like winning the lottery, getting a parking spot or passing a test. I’m referring to praying for things like healing or the restoration of a relationship. When these prayers seem to go unanswered they can cause discouragement and disillusionment. What do we do when our prayers seem to go unanswered?

                When our prayers are unanswered we have a choice to make. We can give up on God or we can draw closer to God. I have a friend who struggles with depression who, because of his depression, chose to forget about God. I also know others who have faced incredible difficulties and, because of those difficulties, are closer to God than ever.

                The Apostle Paul went through his own experience of unanswered prayer. It is found in 2 Corinthians 12:7-10. His experience gives me hope for those times when heaven seems to be shut against me. Here is what Paul wrote.

                To keep me from becoming conceited because of these surpassingly great revelations, there was given me a thorn in my flesh, a messenger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

                This passage has helped me to deal with the disappointment of unanswered prayer. I see some helpful insights that can guide me through my own emotional wilderness.

                Paul was not afraid to pray boldly for what he wanted. He was burdened with a particular ailment. We don’t know for sure what that ailment was, but my guess is that Paul had an eye problem. (Check out Galatians 4:15 and Galatians 6:11) It may be that Paul was going blind. This man who performed miracles and healed in the name of Jesus boldly asked for a miracle for himself. Paul’s example teaches us not to hold back when we pray. Jesus himself opened the door for us to ask boldly for what we need and want. Just because I have not experienced a specific answer to prayer on one occasion, I should not stop expressing my heartfelt wishes to God.

                Paul was persistent in his request. He didn’t ask once and then stop. When he says that he asked three times, I’m sure that we can conclude these were times of intense prayer. Sometimes we give up on prayer before we have even begun. God’s answer may be just around the corner.

                Paul accepted God’s answer. Instead of healing Paul, God gave Paul a heightened awareness of His power and grace. Paul saw that in some ways he could be more effective for the cause of Christ with his weakness. His weakness became the backdrop to the power and glory of Christ.

                Paul recognized that there was a reason behind God’s refusal to answer his specific prayer. Paul had a big ego, with a capital “E”. He was a powerful speaker. He could influence people. He had a unique experience with Christ. We still look at Paul as a super-Christian. Paul’s persistent thorn in the flesh stripped him of his arrogance and self-reliance.

                I personally wish I had as clear of an understanding for why my prayers go unanswered at times. But when God chooses not to remove me from the difficulty that I am facing, I rest in His answer to Paul. “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.”

                Many times when I feel like my prayers are not being answered I give in to the thought that maybe there is something wrong with me. Maybe I don’t deserve what I am asking for or my faith is not strong enough. Then I am reminded that it is not about me at all. It is about God’s glory and power being demonstrated in our world. At those times I am reminded of another favorite passage of scripture.

                But we have this treasure in jars of clay to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not from us. We are hard pressed on every side, but not crushed; perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, but not destroyed. We always carry around in our body the death of Jesus, so that the life of Jesus may also be revealed in our body. [2 Corinthians 4:7-10 (NIV)]

                I will never fully understand why some prayers are answered and others are not. I know that the future holds more opportunities for me to trust God with my unanswered requests. What I am learning, ever so slowly, is to look for the blessing that lies behind the disappointment.

I Asked

Anonymous

I asked God for strength, that I might achieve

I was made weak, that I might learn to humbly obey

I asked for health, that I might do greater things

I was given infirmity, that I might do better things

I asked for riches, that I might be happy

I was given poverty, that I might be wise

I asked for power, that I might have the praise of men

I was given weakness, that I might feel the need for God

I asked for all things, that I might enjoy life

I was given life, that I might enjoy all things

I got nothing I asked for—

But everything that I had hoped for

Almost despite myself, my unspoken prayers were answered

I am, among all, richly blessed